Mischief Managed Romanced
by MrsTater
Summary: How far will a prank war go? LupinTonks
1. Part One: Calling His Bluff Buff

_**Title: **Mischief Managed (Romanced) (1/3)_

_**Author:** MrsTater_

_**Rating: **PG-13_

_**Pairing/Featured Characters: **Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks; Sirius Black, Molly Weasley_

_**Summary: **How far will a prank war go?_

_**Author's Note: **Originally written for the June/July RT Ficathon at LiveJournal, this story is set during the summer of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, the night the Advance Guard rescued Harry from the Dursleys'. Dedicated to **Lady Bracknell**, whose Marauder Remus has been a source of entertainment and inspiration. _

_**Disclaimer: **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended._

* * *

**Part One: Calling His Bluff (Buff)**

"…so I asked Mad-Eye who he knows that's lost a buttock."

Sides aching from her laughter over the anecdote from today's mission, Tonks flopped onto the musty settee in the parlour across from the two wing-backed chairs in which her cousin and his mate sat.

"Merlin, if this job ever makes me _that_ paranoid, please—"

Her mirth died as she realised Remus and Sirius weren't laughing as enthusiastically as they ought to have been. In fact, Sirius was only chuckling politely, and an uncomfortable glance passed between him and Remus, whose lips curved in a slight, tight smile.

"What?" Tonks sat upright. "Did I say something wrong?"

Remus' gaze dropped to his hands folded in his lap, and Sirius continued watching him with something that might have been sympathy. She swallowed that too-familiar lump of embarrassment that always rose from her stomach and lodged bitterly, painfully in her throat whenever she misspoke.

"D'you…" Tonks croaked. She cleared her throat, then continued, "Was Mad-Eye serious?"

"Yes, Nymphadora," said Remus. His voice held no accusation or resentfulness, but Tonks didn't think her mortification could be deeper if it had. "I am afraid this example of Alastor's paranoia has a solid base."

"Or rather," said Sirius, stretching his long legs out on an ottoman, "a _lack_ of a solid base."

Remus gave another tight smile.

Tonks' hands shot up to cover her burning face. "Merlin! Was Mad-Eye talking about himself?"

She should have realised his gruffness – not that he wasn't always gruff – was a cover for embarrassment… She was such an insensitive prat!

"As far as I know," said Remus, "and I haven't any proof, mind you, both Alastor's buttocks are intact."

As Tonks' hands slid from her face and she relaxed, the hot, prickly sensation dissipated from her face.

Only for an instant.

It returned in full force – along with a hint of queasiness – at the realisation that they were discussing buttocks.

Mad-Eye Moody's buttocks.

Well, apparently not Mad-Eye's. But someone else's, which was almost as bad.

"The one-cheeked wizard," said Sirius, rather incongruously cheerful in comparison to Remus, "_is_ in the Order.

Against Tonks' wishes, her mind flashed with images of all the male Order members' backsides. Not that she'd paid a great deal of attention – at least, her gaze had lingered on no one's bum but Remus' …and Kingsley's was good, too…But mostly Remus'.

She'd never noticed anyone being…lopsided…

"The first Order," said Sirius, "had a little saying about this fellow."

"Please don't, Padfoot." Remus screwed his eyes shut as his head lolled against the back of his chair.

Tonks sat up a little straighter. Who'd been in the old Order and was close enough to Remus that he'd be embarrassed for his sake by one of Sirius' jokes?

"Never full moon for Moony."

"Thanks," said Remus quietly. His head bent, and though it could have been the flicker of the firelight behind him, Tonks could have sworn his ears were red.

It was at that moment it really sunk in.

_Remus _had lost a buttock in a wand accident?

"It…it can't be you." An involuntary, shaky laugh heaved itself from Tonks' lungs. "When Mad-Eye…You didn't react."

"Remus is a fantastic actor," said Sirius. "And he's had over fifteen years to get used to it."

"Alas," Remus said, looking up with remarkable composure, though his blue eyes didn't quite meet Tonks' gaze. "Sirius speaks truly." He added, pointedly, "If rather crassly and insensitively."

"Will it prove my sensitivity if I get you a shot of Firewhiskey?" Sirius swung his legs down from the ottoman and stood. His barking laugh rang out as he glanced at Tonks. "You look like you've seen my mum's arse! What's got into you?"

Tonks closed her mouth, which she hadn't realised till then hung agape. "It's just that Remus' bum…"

Sirius arched his dark eyebrows, and Remus tilted his head in an expression of utmost curiosity.

Bloody hell. She'd almost said his bum was too cute to only have one-buttock.

"It's not like you," she recovered tremulously, "to do something careless with your wand."

Sirius sniggered.

"That's _not _what I meant!" Tonks cried.

God, _why_ couldn't this settee be hexed to eat half-bred blood traitors who were humiliating themselves in front of their colleagues?

"Let her alone, Sirius," said Remus kindly.

He stood and turned to face the fire, giving Tonks quite a good view of his apparently one-buttocked bum.

He'd such a lovely bum. This _couldn't _be true.

Clasping his hands behind his back, Remus said in wistful tones, "We are all a bit careless in our youths. And I am afraid I had to learn the hard way not to keep my wand in my back trouser pocket."

"But he really didn't mind being reckless and keeping it other places," said Sirius.

"You're pulling my leg," Tonks said.

"No, Remus found plenty of—"

"I mean about this lost buttock bollocks!" Tonks leapt up from the settee and scrutinised Remus' posterior.

"I take it by your gawking, Cos," said Sirius, sauntering up behind her, "that you're just as impressed by his trouser charm as all the other witches who ogle his arse. He's quite brilliant at making up spells."

"It _was_ a tricky bit of spellwork," Remus said without his usual modesty, "getting them to hang right and stay that way after I've sat."

The hint of amusement in his voice did it. Tonks was convinced.

This was just one big Marauder prank.

And they were so taken with their cleverness that they weren't even trying very hard to hide it.

Did the gits really think she was that green, that gullible? She was an _Auror_, damn it!

Tonks whipped out her wand. "You gents want to see a _really_ impressive bit of spellwork?"

Remus bristled. One hand moved to grip the mantel, as though he were bracing himself. As well he should. Sirius made a sound of starting to speak, but the word died with a strangled sound.

Tonks waved her wand.

Remus' trousers…

…and underwear…

…vanished.

There he stood, in all his pale, two-buttocked glory.

And glory _was _the word for it.

But Tonks' brain ordered her hormones not to be affected.

Her hormones rather willingly obeyed. Ogle-able as Remus' bum was, she was not at all keen on the idea of familiarising herself with it in front of anyone else.

Especially not Sirius, who was howling. "She called your bluff, Moony!"

"No," said Tonks, pocketing her wand, then crossing her arms, "I called his _buff_."

For an instant she was delighted to see Remus' neck and ears had gone as red as she'd felt earlier, and his shoulders were shaking.

Then she realised he was laughing.

"Well, Nymphadora," he said, "now you know it's a myth that werewolves have copious amounts of body hair when not transformed."

No. They didn't.

At least, this one didn't.

Tonks' face flushed so hot that she was sure she would burst into flame.

"May I please have my trousers back?"

She reddened with an entirely different emotion. The prat! He'd made _her _think she'd offended Mad-Eye…then himself…and didn't even have the decency to be embarrassed that he was suddenly half-naked in front of a woman he barely knew!

Without obliging, Tonks turned swiftly on her heel – wobbling a bit – and strode toward the door. "You're an arse, Remus Lupin. A bald, gigantic _arse_."

Grudgingly, she muttered, "Even if you have got a great one."

_**A/N: Thanks to all who reviewed my last piece. Commenting on this one is the charm for a private baring of Remus' bum. **_


	2. Part Two: Turnabout Is Fair Play

**Part Two: Turnabout (Is Fair Play)**

He would never let her get away with it.

And as Remus casually descended the kitchen stairs, hands shoved into the pockets of a tatty pair of jeans and wearing his usual mild expression (_too _mild for a man who'd just had his bare arse exposed before his best mate and the woman he _had_ to know fancied him) Tonks braced herself for his Marauder worst.

No – when Remus' steady gaze lit on her, his lips curving in a slight smile, Tonks' insides squirmed with _anticipation _of his Marauder worst.

Especially if it involved turnabout.

Her heart quickened as he drew out his wand…

…then promptly thudded to her stomach as Remus used it to summon a cup, the kettle, and a bag of tea.

She couldn't let him get away with _that_.

Tilting her chair on the back legs, Tonks said, "I was going to give your trousers back, but you seem to have another pair."

"Yes, that is how it seems." Remus glanced over his shoulder as he filled the kettle, then flicked his wand in her general direction.

Tonks, of course, expected to find herself half-naked.

Her chair legs thumped as it settled firmly on all four legs. Tonks tried to tilt backward again, but the chair was stuck firmly to the floorboards.

Glowering, Tonks flung, "S'that your idea of revenge, Lupin?"

Remus tapped his wand to the kettle, and it emitted its shrill whistle. When he'd filled his mug and put the bag to steep, he turned. "It's _vengeful_ to want to protect an equilibrium-challenged witch from doing herself bodily harm?"

"It's vengeful to spoil my fun." Tonks propped her elbows on the table rested her chin sulkily on her hands.

It was a bit of a stretch to pout about him having a protective streak in regard to her.

"Believe me," said Remus, back to her once more as he strained his teabag, "if I wanted revenge, I'd come up with something a lot better than spoiling your fun."

Didn't he _want_ revenge? He almost implied that he didn't. That just wouldn't do.

"I'm sure you would." Tonks smirked. "After all, I _did _reveal your exhibitionist streak."

"Is that what they're calling it these days? I thought you'd just exposed my arse—"

"Clever."

"– my _great_ arse, as I recall, although I don't know if these jeans are quite as flattering to it as the trousers."

They were, but Tonks quickly looked away with a snort. "One little compliment goes straight to your head."

"Or my…" Remus glanced over his shoulder, completing the thought with a lopsided smile.

Tonks tried to maintain the aloof sarcasm Remus always pulled off so well, but his expression made her powerless to resist dissolving into a gin, waggling her eyebrows, and uttering the inane retort that popped into her head. "_Cheeky_."

Remus groaned, but his low chuckles provided a countermelody to Tonks' unladylike peals.

Tired creases banished by smile lines around his mouth and yes, Remus settled himself in the chair across from her. Tea in hand, he propped his legs on the seat at the head of the table in a posture that was atypically relaxed – and Tonks guessed, Marauderish.

"You haven't hexed my other trousers into oblivion, have you?"

"Nope."

Tonks swung her feet up onto the chair with Remus'. He tilted his head to look down at them, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. Was he thinking the same thing she was, that her feet looked very small next to his?

No – it was too ridiculous a thing for Remus to think. He was probably wondering if resizing her foot would make her less clumsy.

"Not that you would have any reason to notice…" He nudged her foot with his, and cut his eyes sidelong to peer through his fringe at her. "But I haven't an extensive wardrobe – or a great exhibitionist streak – and I need to have one pair to wear whilst the others are in the wash."

She flushed slightly; not because he'd given her any sense at her prank making him uncomfortable about his wardrobe, but because of his implication that she had, indeed, paid attention to his clothes. She wondered if he knew that she liked the way the dark blue jumper he wore now fitted across his slight shoulders.

But when was he going to get around to Marauding?

"But you've got a _slight_ exhibitionist streak?" Tonks returned the foot nudge. "You're a good sport."

Remus arched his eyebrows as he sipped his tea. "How so?"

Her reply was not immediate; their feet were still touching. Hadn't she moved away? Or hadn't he?

"You haven't vanished _my _trousers."

Not meeting her eyes as he blew on his steaming cup of tea, Remus said, "That wouldn't be very gentlemanly, would it?"

"It wasn't very ladylike of me to vanish yours."

"True. But you were getting revenge for _my_ prank."

Tonks had a very hard time keeping her jaw off the table. His smile was hesitant, almost…

…_apologetic._

Flashing a broad grin, Tonks nudged his foot again. "Turnabout's fair play, you know."

"Don't tempt me, Nymphadora." Remus' Adam's apple bobbed. "The last thing I want is to embarrass you again."

The word _embarrass _struck Tonks as much more applicable to the one who'd been de-trousered. Was he hinting? He'd seemed absolutely unruffled.

Then again, Sirius had said Remus was a fantastic actor…

Tonks swallowed hard and croaked, "Again?"

Remus' brows knit. "My joke was hardly believable, was it? Yet Sirius and I kept on with it, implying we thought you gullible. It's no wonder you got angry and went so far—"

Tonks opened her mouth, but could produce no sound. Angry? When had she let on that she was _angry_? They'd been joking about it just now…

She'd flirted.

She'd called his arse _great._

"_Too _far," said Remus in low tones, shifting in his seat, feet sliding to the floor again. He fingered the handle of his mug and looked introspective. "You left because you were mortified. Especially by my comment about…" He swallowed again and half-choked, "…body hair." His gaze flicked upward, and was dark. "I'm sorry, Nymphadora."

Oh God…_Too far. _She'd gone too far. She was always doing that, though she hadn't thought….But there it was, straight from Remus' lips.

Even worse, he was too nice to tell her she'd humiliated him.

Had anyone ever been suffocated by their own heart lodging in their throat? It was the sort of undignified death Tonks had always imagined she would have, after such a social blunder as vanishing a bloke's trousers. No going down in a blaze of duty in the line of battle for Nymphadora Tonks.

Her epitaph would read, _Died of embarrassment. Literally._

If she'd dropped dead from the affliction, she wouldn't have minded. But she'd like to apologise first, to give Remus that closure, if not anything good to say in eulogy.

The heart-in-throat issue, however, prohibited speaking as well as breathing.

In the suffocating silence, a creaking step startled Tonks as much as Mrs. Black's portrait ever had done. Her airway actually cleared as her gaze was dragged from Remus to the source of the sound.

Molly was coming downstairs, wearing her purple quilted dressing gown and an expression of mingled pleasure and sheepishness.

"Tonks, dear! I thought you'd gone hours ago."

"I stayed to chat with Remus and Sirius," said Tonks miserably, wishing to Merlin she'd gone home and written reports for work. Anything but staying here and stripping Remus.

The image of his arse, which she'd been sure would inspire lovely dreams, now made her feel like a schoolgirl who'd peeked into the boys' bathroom and mortified the object of her crush.

As Molly stepped into the lit kitchen, Tonks noticed her hair was frizzy, and her face was flushed. While at first she'd thought Molly was pleased and sheepish to have caught Remus and Tonks together – _alone_ – at such a late hour, she now suspected the reverse was true.

Any other time, Tonks would have risked laughing to glance at Remus to see his amusement. Now she didn't feel very amused at all, but glanced at Remus anyway. He was still pensive, and looked almost as if he hadn't noticed Molly at all.

"I hope I'm not interrupting," said Molly, slippered feet shuffling to the counter.

"Not at all," said Remus kindly, and with a smile that belied nothing of what had just transpired with Tonks.

He really ought to pursue a career in the theatre. Those artistic types would probably be accepting of his condition, too.

"Arthur and I just wanted a midnight snack." In profile, her face was red. She summoned leftover cake from the pantry, as well as a bottle of elderflower wine. "That really was clever, Tonks, how you got Harry's uncle and aunt out of the house. Cake?"

"I wouldn't mind some." Remus rose and took two goblets and four plates out of the cupboard. "And isn't Nymphadora _very _clever?"

Tonks cringed at his use of her Christian name. He'd used it flirtatiously when introducing Harry. She'd complained, but secretly – well, perhaps not secret from Remus – liked the way it sounded in his raspy, careful tones. That same softness was in his pronunciation now, but Tonks assigned no intimacy to it – even though Molly looked beside herself with joy as she glanced back and forth from Remus to her.

No, Remus wasn't flirting. He was being sarcastic. He had to be. She'd vanished his trousers and humiliated him…Oh God…

"I could never think of a ruse like that," said Molly, offering Remus a generous slice. "But then, I suppose that's why you're an Auror and I'm not. Would you like a piece, dear?"

The thought of cake was nauseating. Tonks wagged her head slowly.

"Tonks has a mischievous streak. Very useful in such a covert business as ours." Gleaming blue eyes fixed Tonks as Remus took a slow bite of cake, then summoned his tea. He washed down the cake with a long drink, then said, "You will find, Molly, that a fair number of Order members got up to no good in their school days."

His lips quirked in his amiable smile, but again he looked like he was thinking very hard about something else entirely.

"I can't believe either of you got up to anything _really_ bad when you were at Hogwarts." Molly looked a little troubled as she poured wine. "Certainly, Remus, you weren't as wild as I've heard Sirius was."

"I didn't get caught as often as Sirius."

"I always got cau—" Tonks' muttered response became a sharp gasp.

"Tonks, dear?" Molly asked with concern. "Is everything all right?"

Tonks didn't dare turn.

She'd gasped because her bra had unclasped…

…then, with a faint breeze-like feeling…

…vanished.

Well, not _vanished_.

As Remus came into her line of vision, making his way back to his seat, Tonks saw a bit of hot pink lace poking out of his pocket.

He smirked.

"Remus is a filthy git," said Tonks through clenched teeth. "Worse than Sirius ever dreamed of being."

He'd fooled her. He'd made her feel _guilty _about a prank, all the while plotting to steal her underwear right from off her body.

Molly murmured something that sounded vaguely like _oh dear_, but Tonks couldn't be sure. She was too preoccupied by the sensation of her stomach having dropped down to her toes as Remus arched an expressive eyebrow.

Oh, it had been a mistake to praise his Marauding. She—

Merlin's beard.

Tonks' nether regions were definitely in contact with more denim than normal.

"Lovely," said Remus, glancing below the table at something in his hand. "A matched set."

"Yes," said Molly wistfully, levitating a tray of cake and wine en route to the stairs, "the Blacks do have lovely china."

At Remus' snort of laughter that surprisingly did not shoot tea out of his nose, Molly very nearly took a lesson in the school of Tonks and dropped the tray. She gave them a puzzled look, mumbled something about hoping they got it all sorted out, then scurried upstairs.

A very startling crack of Apparation indicated Molly was too eager to get back to Arthur to take the rest of the stairs.

The wry expression Tonks had expected to see on Remus' face earlier appeared now.

"It seems," he said, clearing his throat, "that we are not the only ones exercising…certain kinds of spells…tonight."

Tonks smothered a laugh, but failed not to blush. She was grateful for her crossed-arm posture because it was at least an intimidating pose, even if she was primarily concealing her unsupported chest.

Remus sobered instantly, though his sparkling eyes told her he wasn't the least bit intimidated.

"Tell me, Lupin," Tonks said in her best interrogation voice. "How does all that bollocks about going too far and not wanting to embarrass me mesh with your little underwear stunt?"

"That wasn't too far at all." Remus took a bite of cake. "Too far would have been vanishing an article Molly would have noticed. And I don't get the idea you're particularly embarrassed – even if that pose does feign modesty."

Tonks laughed and lowered her arms, and was flooded with a different kind of warmth, a tingling, exciting kind, as Remus' eyes flicked appreciatively downward.

"You _are _a git though," she said, "for making me think I'd mortified you. Do you know I was getting ready to _apologise_?"

"I never in a million years expected you to fall for that. And how could I be embarrassed?"

"In case you've forgot…" Tonks leant across the table conspiratorially. "…I bared your bum."

"You're a very clever young witch…" Remus matched her hushed tone. "…and I've speculated about your underwear for some time."

His head ducked slightly, and his fringe fell over his forehead. Tonks wasn't sure she'd ever seen anything more adorable than his boyish, half-shy grin.

Though she wasn't sure _adorable _was exactly the word for it. Because he'd certainly stolen her breath and accelerated her heart with that look.

"If you wanted to see me undressed, and…" Remus paused for a moment, then continued huskily, "…liked what you saw…" Blue eyes locked with hers. "…how could I be anything but flattered?"

Tonks had never quite given up dreaming that one day she might be composed enough to come up with the perfect response to a melting line like that. She relinquished it the instant she opened her mouth and blurted, "Have you really thought about my underwear?"

"Oh yes. And my hypothesis about what kind you wore was correct."

Tonks considered the bright pink and orange trimmed bra and knickers now in Remus' possession. "Why, because they're loud, or because they're sexy?"

She should have known better than to expect anything but a smirk and raised eyebrow in response.

"So, Nymphadora…" Remus drew the underwear from his pocket and spread them across the table. "Are we going to call a truce and trade to get our own belongings back? Or shall we indulge in another round of turnabout?"

Eyes locked. Breath caught. Heartbeat ceased.

"It's fair play."

"So they say."

Somehow, though his voice was raspy and his half-grin sexy, Tonks managed to give her head a little toss and ask in a perfectly aloof tone, "Does that mean you're going to start playing fair?"

"Haven't I done?"

"I vanish your trousers, you vanish mine."

"That would be fair," Remus agreed, "especially since I'm wearing as little underneath as you are."

Tonks blinked. "You haven't got any underwear on?"

"You took the only pair that wasn't in the wash."

Her throat had gone dry at the new mental image to accompany the one she had of Remus' backside.

But she laughed at a considerably less sexy, but no less endearing, thought.

"You're such a bachelor," she said, "putting off your wash like that."

"My mother always warned me emergencies might arise…Somehow I doubt this is what she meant."

"Are you sure?"

Laughing softly, Remus said, "So…trousers for trousers…"

"Shirts for shirts. You haven't got a bra on, I presume?"

"Certainly not."

"Or…"

Tonks stood and slipped around the table to Remus. He turned in his chair, and she slipped between his knees and leant to face level with him.

"…or if I do this…"

She brushed her lips over his.

Remus' hands settled on her hips, pulling her closer.

His mouth met hers again with a smile that said he would _never _let her get away with it.

* * *

_**A/N: To all who commented on the previous chapter, your feedback is much appreciated. Reviewing this one will inspire Marauder Remus to vanish your undies. Whether he does it in front of other people is, of course, up to you. He's a gentleman, even when up to no good. **_


	3. Part Three: Strip Tease

**Part Three: Strip (Tease)**

It was just a bit of kissing.

With Remus Lupin.

A colleague. A former professor. A kind man. A wizard she very much respected.

A man whose trousers she'd vanished in retaliation for a prank.

A man who'd vanished her underwear in retaliation for the trousers.

Kissing was the natural progression of things.

Wasn't it?

It gave them both a break from all that retaliation, anyway.

Then again, she hadn't planned on kissing anyone tonight.

Sure, she was interested in Remus. She noticed him. Over time, she'd gone from observing him as she did every other person, to admiring him. Noticing his eyes, his smile, the lines of his face, the way his tatty, stretched sweaters fit across his shoulders…and eventually how his baggy, patched trousers still managed to highlight a great arse… It all had led to this….

…but she'd never really thought about _this_.

Had she?

_Intrigued _might be a better word than _interested_. She was fascinated by the dichotomy of responsible Order member and boyish prankster; of mild-mannered Englishman with werewolf.

Who wouldn't be?

Especially with an arse like that.

It was ridiculous to try and figure it out right now, with that mental image…. She couldn't think straight, and would never get it all sorted.

His lips slid tantalizingly over hers. Skimming one moment in light, careful caresses; then the next pressing a little harder: intent, deliberate, _coaxing_.

His knees rested against the sides of her legs, opening a little more, then pressing into her again as one of his hands cupped the back of her neck and drew her deeper in to him. The long fingers of the other worked through her hair.

Tonks moaned.

Right then. Interested _was_ the word, after all.

But it was just a bit of kissing…

Only a bit of tingle-inducing kissing…

Oh God…._Where_ had this man learned to kiss? It felt like magic. She wouldn't put it past him to know kissing charms. She'd had more passionate kisses than this, but nothing had ever tugged and pulled at her insides as though she were…

…Apparating?

Something about their surroundings – not that she was particularly aware of much but standing between Remus' knees, and his hands on her neck and face and hair – seemed different. Her eyes snapped open as she broke their kiss.

_He'd Apparated them to his bedroom. _

The bed wasn't made. That was…_interesting_. Word of the night.

Her insides continued their feverish dance as she realised Remus was standing very close to her, hands sliding down her back, settling on her hips.

She really needed to keep on top of him.

Wincing at her bad phrasing – glad it was only a thought, hoping he wasn't a Legilimens – she said, "Didn't you hear Molly scolding the twins for Apparating in the house?"

"She does considerably more than _scold _the twins," said Remus, "and in case you've forgotten, _Molly_ _herself_ Apparated in the house just a moment ago."

Oh. Right. She _had_ forgot. And she'd happily forget again. She didn't really want to think about anybody else's romantic mischief but her own, thank you very much.

"Anyway," Remus continued, "I'd much rather face her wrath for Apparating than being caught by her in a game of Trousers for Trousers, Shirts for Shirts."

He leant into her, and Tonks tilted her face upward to meet his mouth.

But Remus paused a breath away and quirked an eyebrow at her. "I assume you've no wish to surrender our prank war?"

His voice was low and husky. It – or his breath on her mouth – or both – sent shivers and tingles throughout her body. And he seemed aware of the effect it was having on her.

Tonks hadn't known Remus very long when she abandoned the idea that quietness meant he was serious. Still, she'd not pegged him as the adept-at-seduction type.

Blimey, _was _he seducing her?

Greying hair, smile lines, and a slight build suddenly seemed very sexy. But it wasn't just the fact that he was smooth that boosted his attraction. There wasjust a hint of shyness in those blue eyes peering at her from under the shaggy ends of his hair.

Something more than mere wanting was at work here.

_He fancied her. _

For how long? And when had he been planning on telling her? Had he planned on it at all? She'd hoped before now that he fancied her, but his brand of flirtation prior to tonight had been hard to read. Maybe he liked witches to make the first move? She wouldn't put it past him to have read the future and known she would de-trouser him. It would be just like Remus for this all to be some great scheme…

Ridiculous. Remus was a powerful wizard, but he wasn't a seer.

She nearly smacked herself on the forehead. That half-shy look meant fear of disappointment. Fear that this was just a game, fear that she didn't fancy him back.

He was being – and had been – _cautious_.

Remus needn't fear.

Tonks did fancy him.

Very much.

More than she had before this whole prank war started.

And Nymphadora Tonks _never _surrendered.

Whipping out her wand, she vanished his dark blue jumper.

Tonks folded her arms across her chest and met his gaze with a smirk.

Her challenging pose fell when she saw the expected Marauderish glint was not sparkling in Remus' eyes.

His look wasn't self-conscious, precisely. How could he be, the man who hadn't been embarrassed when she'd bared his arse?

But that had been a prank. She hadn't vanished his trousers out of a conscious desire to get him naked, and he knew it.

Subconscious desire, apparently. But Remus wasn't reading her subconscious at the moment. He was just a man who fancied a woman he hoped found him attractive.

He wasn't the sort of bloke she'd see on the street and give a second glance to. He wasn't broad, he wasn't muscular. He was slender – skinny, even – and pale.

But the little hollows in his throat and collarbones looked kissable.

What reaction would that get out of him?

Tonks had to know.

His stomach dipped inward with a sharp intake of breath as she pressed her mouth between shoulder and neck. His skin was so very warm and smooth against her cheek, and she wanted to touch more of him. She slid her arms around his waist so she could at least feel the bare skin below the sleeves of her t-shirt against his.

Remus' hands splayed flat on her back, drawing her closer against him. Merlin, how she wanted to feel his palms on her skin. His breath was hot on her neck as his chin rested on her shoulder. She was acutely aware, of all ridiculous things, his day's growth of beard scratching against the cotton of her t-shirt. It would prickly deliciously against her bare shoulder…

Wasn't it about time Remus retaliated?

Her own breath hitched, then shuddered out, as she trailed kisses across his soft, taut skin. She liked the feel of him, and she liked making him feel.

She wasn't sure which she liked more.

Remus' chest rumbled against her as he said, "We're playing by _those_ rules, then?"

Tonks couldn't raise her head as she murmured, "D'you have some other rules in mind?"

The long fingers slipped under the hem of her t-shirt. The tips were cold, yet as they sent shivers racing up her spine, they spread warmth that stole into places hidden so deep inside she hadn't even known they were part of her. His face brushed against hers as his lips softly kissed her temple, her cheekbone, her jaw, her ear.

"Do we have to use magic?" Remus rasped into her ear, making her squirm as goose bumps rose on her neck and down her shoulders and arms. "Personally, I think clothing removal is more fun the Muggle way."

"I wouldn't want to spoil your fun."

It was, undoubtedly, more magical to feel his hands on her bare skin, easing her shirt upward than to simply have it all vanished away and be presented in all her glory at once.

Or was it the way his hair fell over his forehead as he bent to watch the slow revelation of her midriff? She wished she could see his eyes…

Long, thin frame dropping to a crouch, his fingers held her waist lightly as he pressed his mouth to her stomach. He rose slightly as he continued an upward trail, inching her shirt higher, hands closing more confidently around her hips.

Tonks was wondering if she'd be able to keep on her feet much longer, when he straightened, soft brown hair tickling her tummy as he rose. He paused, poised to raise her shirt to reveal her breasts. His thumb just grazed the underside, and her heart, already pounding at what seemed like the highest possible rate, accelerated even more.

What would _he _think of _her_? She wore her own small-busted body. She was nothing spectacular. There were lots of much sexier witches in the world.

For the first time, _she _hesitated.

_How far would this go?_

The moment of insecurity melted away as she realised what his pause implied.

His eyes met hers.

He was sure about his. But he wanted her to be sure, too.

Somehow she'd never had less control over her own facial muscles, but she moved her mouth in what she hoped was a smile. She supposed she was successful; Remus smiled back.

A sexy half-grin. His eyes darkened as his gaze dropped to her chest. Fingers scrabbled awkwardly as he tried to get her shirt over her arms.

Apparently the sight of her breasts rendered him quite useless.

Tonks would have helped him, but the sight of Remus rendered useless rendered _her _useless. "If you don't get it off, Remus, you surrender."

With a noise of frustration, he muttered something that sounded very much like _Bugger the Muggle way_ and, with another unintelligible phrase, vanished her t-shirt.

Okay, so she didn't mind that so much. Especially not when he pulled her to him, and she felt his skin, so warm, against her own. He was thin and slight, but they fitted together so wonderfully…

…and then she was lying on the unmade bed – _his _bed – surrounded by the cool sheets _he _had entangled. (Had he lain here and imagined doing this? He'd said he'd speculated about what sort of bra and knickers she wore.)

The mattress sagged and bedsprings creaked as he stretched himself over her, wiry arms flexed as he rested his weight on his elbows.

God, she _loved _the way he looked, leaning over her like that…She mussed his hair, in the light rich and silver-streaked, as he kissed her neck, her breast…Lips supple, cheek smooth, chin just the slightest bit rough and inducing her to arch her back and press her stomach against his – soft but firm and another dichotomy – as his tongue found her nipple, and—

_Oh God. _

She needed to kiss him.

But when she tried to draw his mouth up to hers, he laughed low and continued applying his teasing ministrations to her body, easing himself more on top of her, one leg sliding between hers, foot rubbing her calf...

Well then. Two could play at _that _game.

Letting her eyelids droop, she yawned hugely.

Remus' eyes flicked upward as his lips hovered over her breast. "Am I boring you, Nymphadora?"

"Don't call me Nymphadora," she said in her best grumpy voice – which, for once, was difficult to feign, because his fingertips were working a magic up and down her sides that bid her insides to dance, and she really did like the way Remus could say her name.

She liked the way it sounded falling from his lips, his lips that lingered so close to her skin, to her breast, under these circumstances.

Even though she _shouldn't_ like him using her name, the great teasing prat.

Tonks yawned again. Impressively. Convincingly.

The lines of Remus' face deepened as his features fell.

It was all Tonks could do not to smile. She touched his cheek. "I'm really sorry, Remus. I thought I was up for this, but I s'pose I was wrong."

His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed hard.

_Oh, she was being terribly mean…_

He'd get over it. He was a Marauder.

And he'd got her half-naked.

In his bed.

She pushed his fringe out of his face. "We just had such a long day…What with getting Harry and all…It was pretty stressful to be so secretive and vigilant…"

He nodded with a tight grin. Trying very hard not to look disappointed.

_It was very hard to let him be disappointed. _

She'd make it up to him.

"And you know I find it rather tiring," she said through another yawn, "coming up with great tricks."

Remus' eyes widened, then glinted – but the way he settled himself on top of her belied his scowl. "You little tease."

"I never thought you'd actually fall for—"

Soft denim rubbed against her thighs – but not _her _jeans.

No, Tonks' jeans were quite absent.

The sparkle in Remus' darkening eyes was quite present.

But this time, when she pulled him to bring their mouths together, he yielded.

The natural progression was definitely more than just a bit of kissing.

* * *

_**A/N: It's been fun sharing this fic with all of you. Your comments are very much appreciated. This time, Remus will Apparate reviewers to his bedroom (with your choice of made or unmade bed) for a Wizarding or Muggle-style striptease. **_


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